My Experience In A Rebound Relationship

It’s interesting how relationships work – communication, trust, respect, love.
I have realized this more so over the past year than I ever have.

For those of you who don’t know, after my 4-year relationship ended, I wasted no time to date. I’m still trying to figure out if I did this out of spite, or if I thought I was truly ready to date.

Nonetheless, I trudged forward with someone who I thought would be a good fit. Initially he was, but I slowly realized his affection for alcohol. Any time we went out, he had to have a drink. On our way back from one of our nights out, he began yelling at me in public due to our differences in religion. I felt so embarrassed and asked him to please stop because people were looking at us. When we got onto the public transportation, he just glared at me, shook his head, and laughed. Okay, creeper! I brushed it off, until it started happening more and more frequently. Only, it wasn’t always with me. Sometimes he would start yelling at random people, and flailing his arms in public.

Throughout the duration of the year, my friends were trying to show me the red flags. Again, I had my blinders on, and didn’t see the issues like they did.

The icing on the cake was when I went to his house, looked in his backyard, and found a wooden table shattered into pieces. I then noticed white paint cans tipped over with paint dripping all over the concrete. I asked if his dog may have knocked things around, but he admitted he had a few drinks and took out his aggression following a football game where his favorite team lost.

Yes, there were other instances, but I think you can get the gist of the story from the two I listed. 

I had never felt scared before in a relationship. I admitted to my friends the fears I had, and I finally got to the point where I had to stop talking to him. I knew by having the whole “Let’s stop seeing each other” conversation would blow up in my face, so I just slowed our communication until I put enough distance between us to tell him I was no longer interested.

I have been feeling a sense of freedom and relief since ending things with Josh. I have been happier, and I can only hope he can recover from alcoholism (or whatever his deal is…) and find a beautiful girl.

I wasn’t the person to save him from himself.

My biggest lesson learned during the course of the past year was to not stay with someone just to have a warm body by my side, and when red flags appear, to leave. I think I wanted to have that feeling of belonging and love with someone. I was essentially trying to replicate the wonderful relationship I had with my ex, with Josh. I would suggest taking some time to yourself to evaluate what YOU want, following the demise of a relationship. Attempting to spark another will not help, but only hinder any positive progress. I am now left putting the pieces back together of 2 failed relationships.

I have plenty of friends, family, and even my social network friends who care about me. I am incredibly thankful for everyone who stuck by me, even when they probably could say: “I told you so.”

I lived, I learned, and I won’t be doing that again!

My Early Life with Dysfunctional Eustachian Tubes

I figured I’d write about something near and dear to my heart. For those of you who have known me a while, you probably don’t know about this, but here goes.

When I was around 2-3 years old, I suffered from chronic earaches. I remember drinking ‘pink liquid’ like it was water. My Mom was frequently taking me to the doctor to figure out what was wrong, but they kept telling her it was allergies and a little amoxicillin would cure me. They also handed out ear drops like they were going out of style. I absolutely hated them because they always made me feel worse.

Another doctor’s visit later, my Mom finally stood up for herself (and me) and told the doctor that something clearly was wrong. She asked the doctor to refer us to a specialist. The specialist ended up being a doctor at Children’s Hospital up in Kearny Mesa. I believe his name was Dr. Kearns.

After a hearing test and examination, Dr. Kearns determined I was suffering from 80% hearing loss. Fluid was not draining like it was supposed to, causing an infection and hearing loss in my Eustachian tubes. The solution was to utilize ear tubes to ventilate my Eustachian tubes, which would ideally improve my hearing.

I don’t remember anything about the surgery itself, but I do remember going to Scripps in Torrey Pines for further hearing tests and examinations. Meanwhile, I was fitted with specially-made ear plugs because water could not enter my ear while I was being treated. I could not swim, and when I showered, I had to use the ear plugs to prevent any moisture from entering my ear.

I remember going to Coronado one year for 4^th of July and hearing fireworks for the first time. I cried because the sound was so loud, and covered my entire head in a blanket. I would compare this sound to someone taking a blowhorn to your ears.  Not pleasant at all.

When the tubes were removed, my Mom said there was a substantial increase in my hearing and I was much happier because I wasn’t in pain. She said I pointed to the birds in our back yard, because I never knew they made sounds.

As an adult, I am thankful for my Mom paying close attention to my health and standing up for herself because she knew something was wrong.

In elementary school, I picked up an American Sign Language book and began teaching myself how to finger spell. By middle school, I could hold my own in a conversation and befriended some of the deaf and hard-of-hearing students. It was great because if I didn’t know a particular sign, I could fingerspell it, and the person I was talking to would teach me the sign and respond. It was awesome.

When I worked at Dixieline, I had a coworker who had noise-induced hearing loss. She wore hearing aids, and could speak normally. Occasionally, she and I would sign because our store would become very loud and she couldn’t hear me. People would walk by and make remarks such as: “What, you two have a secret language or something?” and “Why are you signing?” It was frustrating at times because I had to maintain my composure about our ‘secret language’ and explain why we signed. I also felt bad for her because she would face insults and mean remarks because she had to repeat herself for customers and they’d accuse her of not listening to their requests. Sometimes, I’d pull the customer aside and explain the situation so they could apologize for being rude to her.

I considered becoming a sign language interpreter for the court system but later changed my mind. Maybe one day I will reconsider.

I know my hearing is not 100%, but I believe the tubes saved quite a bit of my hearing. I really would like to have a hearing test done to see how my ears are doing, but I don’t have insurance. I still suffer from hearing issues especially when I fly, or go to high altitudes. For some reason, my ears will not lose the plugged feeling. I feel bad for whoever I fly with, because I feel as though all I ask is, “Huh?” I have tried chewing gum, but to no avail. I also have issues with my equilibrium during and after roller coaster rides. My ears plug up and I feel woozy for a good 20 minutes before feeling somewhat normal. I tend to simply avoid rollercoasters due to this.

So what’s the point of my rant?

I want those of you who have small children to challenge what your doctor says, if you feel even slightly unsure of the prognosis. Drugging your kid up with antibiotics does nothing but make the child groggy and less immune to other illnesses, when a root issue may be to blame. Eustachian tube dysfunction is more common than I thought, though not all children face hearing loss due to this issue. Some will simply tug at their ears, and will face frequent ear infections.

I am also writing this because I would really like to join a deaf or hard-of-hearing meet up group. I’m sure these individuals could use another friend and a listening ear, so to speak. I feel that if I know a language, I should put it to good use, and bring a smile to someone’s face. Who knows, maybe I will meet someone who had (or has) the same condition I did. I’d also like for people to realize they need to use common etiquette when dealing with folks who have disabilities and/or special needs. Making a mockery of people does not improve the situation. If you have a question, just ask. If you don’t know sign language, but want to communicate with a deaf person, feel free to grab a pen and paper, and communicate that way. I am sure it would be much appreciated, and you too, may make a friend simply because you were kind enough to strike up a conversation.

Heading to Portland!

So, I’m heading to Portland next week. My last visit was over 5 years ago, but I do know my way around up there.

Do any of you have any suggestions where I should go while visiting? Any cool exhibits or areas I must see?

A Camry Does Not Equal a Corolla

It’s been a while since I’ve posted. I have been enjoying my summer free from school and homework. Even though I have been on break, I have been looking at my finances to see if I could afford a new(er) car. I was incredibly concerned whether or not I could afford to make car payments, and whether or not I was ready to commit to them for 5 years.

On the flipside, I had a 1995 Mercedes Benz C280. Certainly a cute car, with only 80,000 miles, but it was costing me $200+ a month just in gas. In the 4 years I owned the vehicle, I spent roughly $5,000 in repairs. $3,800 of it included a new wiring harness, new throttle body, and a water pump, because the damn car decided to die on the freeway during rush hour traffic.

I went to various dealerships to see what their APR was, and to test drive any vehicle(s) I was interested in. I decided I would look for a Toyota Corolla, specifically white or black, and the car must have a sunroof. I was highly amazed how many dealerships attempted to con me into buying something I did not want. Some would attempt to show me a Camry, until I stopped them and said: “Um, this is a Camry.” They then tried to convince me the engine was “Really not that much bigger” and “both cars get roughly the same gas mileage.”
As soon as they started doing that crap, I’d leave. I may be a woman, but I do know enough about vehicle makes and models, along with engine sizes, to know that a Camry does not equal a Corolla.

I then went to another dealership because I saw a 2007 Corolla they had in stock on their website. I immediately fell in love because it was white, had a sunroof, had a 6-disc CD changer, and to top it all off, it had leather seats! I didn’t have to sacrifice any features from my Benz. The friendly dealership let me take the car home for FREE for an ‘Overnight Test Drive.’ I absolutely loved the way it handled, and I loved how fuel-efficient it was. I just wasn’t certain if I was ready for car payments, so I sat on the notion of getting a newer car for a month.

I ended up creating an Excel spreadsheet of my monthly expenses, and determined getting the car would only cost me $100 more a month than what I was paying. I figured it would be better to get a newer car with a warranty, rather than forking out money on an old Mercedes which was depreciating quickly.

I have had my car for a month now, and I have yet to spend over $100 in gas. I also qualified for the 2.9% APR, and was able to score the extended warranty for only $10 extra a month on the payment. It’s going to be so nice not having to fork out mass amounts of money to get this car fixed!

I also did some research on Toyota’s Website, and found their owner’s website. I was able to look up my car’s service history for free, and thankfully, my car was very well-maintained. I also have access to owner’s manuals and other Toyota-owner perks. I thought this was handy for people like myself who are curious about the condition of their Toyota.

If you’re interested, here are some pictures of my car:

Leather InteriorInstrument Cluster and Steering Wheel

Looking to add some fun to your next San Diego party?

Ready for some fun in the sun?
Summer 2011 has officially arrived!

Let Triple T Jumps help you with your next summer party!

We serve all of San Diego County, and can be reached at (619) 328-1671 or http://tripletjumps.com

Make the most of your next party with a bounce house rental from Triple T Jumps, and the fun is just about guaranteed!
Make your event unforgettable:
• Brings your party or event to life.
• Brings laughter and smiles to you and your guests.

• We deliver, set-up and pick-up; allowing you and your guests to relax and have fun!

Climb up the steep stairs… and get ready to go down a fast drop and hit the rip curl at the bottom of the slide.
It is fast and fun…
This is not your ordinary slide!!

Our moonwalks, bouncers and water slides are big inflatables that children love to jump and slide on. This kind of children’s entertainment is always a big hit at Birthday Parties, School Events, Day Care Centers and Family Reunions. Reserving a moonwalk will ensure professional service and a great time at your next party or special event.

Give that birthday party, bar mitzvah, bat mitzvah, quinceanera, sweet sixteen, grand opening or corporate event a carnival/fair/festival feeling and order the cotton candy machine and or the snow cone machine with one of our moonwalks, water slides or water slip and slides.

The Disney Princesses are sure to bring some magic with this licensed bounce house! This bounce house is a home for classic princesses Belle, Snow White, Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty. Girls will enjoy reigning over their castle, while boys can play the part of the gallant princes!

The 4-in-1 combo-style bounce house is the ultimate in inflatable jumpers! This bouncy castle has an obstacle course and a convenient exit slide for hours of active fun! Parents and spectators are offered a clear view with the 360-degree mesh sides of this moonwalk. The 3D 4-in-1 combo bounce house is sure to make any indoor or outdoor event a great success!

Join Ariel and friends in this under-the-sea jumper. From Disney’s classic film, this Jump has a life-size picture of Ariel in her underwater playground. This one also comes with an entrance step so even the younger ones can get in and out easily.

Join Scooby and gang as they battle villains and ghosts in this jump. With graphics from the actual Warner Bros. hit movies, your kids will soon be acting like detectives and turn into monster chasers. This Jump also comes with an entrance step so everyone can get in and out easily.

No matter which Batman movie is your favorite, this jumper will turn everyone into a crime-fighting superhero. This Jump comes with an entrance step so everyone can get in and out easily.

Gladiator Jousts

Partygoers will love the chance to try the inflatable version of the Gladiator Joust. This game puts two gladiators doing battle in an inflatable arena on foam-padded pedestals The gladiators attempt to win by using oversized joust poles to knock the opposition off their pedestals. One of our favorites for participants and the crowd cheering them on to victory!

Double Hoops Shot
Shoot for the THREE! This fun inflatable game is sure to be a SLAM DUNK at Fall Festivals, Backyard Parties, Church and Corporate Events. It’s sure to draw a crowd!

Don’t just write your resume, own it!

Here’s my first blog on WordPress. Just taking a generic stab, so please don’t throw me under the bus!

In this horrific economy, the demand for jobs is high, while the availability is minimal.

I know numerous people who bitch and complain about not being able to find a job, or are unsuccessful at landing an interview.

Let’s evaluate things a little closer:

What do you submit to a prospective employer first? Your resume.
It’s mind-boggling to think that so many people submit incomplete and/or grammatically incorrect resumes. It’s kinda like walking into an interview with a stain on your shirt. Not cute.

One of the biggest concepts which has helped me when writing my resume, is to assume the reader knows nothing about you or your former position(s). You need to make yourself sound great, without appearing grandiose.

Carefully analyze the job description for key words and phrases. Carefully integrate these into your resume to pin-point specific areas required for the job.

• What did you do? Be descriptive.
• How did it contribute to the overall health of the organization?
• Did you streamline a specific process, reducing costs?
• Did you implement a new procedure? Did you invent something new?
  “Utilized knowledge of assigned programs, priorities, goals, and objectives to identify workflow problems or other situations which had a negative impact on organizational efficiency.”
• Highlight any obstacles or barriers you overcame to achieve a desired result.
  One of mine would be that I maintained my professionalism and dedication to my job, while taking 17 units. Inevitably, my dedication earned me a 3.6 semester G.P.A., and demonstrated to pessimists that “Yes, I can do it!”
• Demonstrate a level of commitment and persistence!
  “Ensured accuracy and conformance with applicable workplace regulations. Resolved complex timekeeping concerns and inquiries.”
• Did you receive any awards or certificates? If so, describe them.
• Do you speak any foreign languages? Highlight these skills, even if you don’t speak the entire language. If you don’t know any foreign languages, consider brushing up on some!
• Do you have any future educational/personal/career goals? Show motivation! Highlight classes which will cater to your career and educational goals.
  “Currently pursuing my Bachelor of Science in Engineering, and my Bachelor of Arts in English.”
  “Continue to exceed the organization’s requirement of a 2.0 G.P.A.”
  “Enroll in a C++ Programming course, to enhance my analytical skills.”
• Proofread…PROOFREAD…PROOFREAD!
  Sure, you may have your PhD, but nothing looks worse than a misspelled word- especially those that have double entendres. Specifically, know the difference between “your” and “you’re”; “there”, “their”, and “they’re”.

What if you’re rather inexperienced?
That’s alright! What you need to evaluate is the experience you DO have.

• Have you ever baby-sat a child? If so, this demonstrates trust and accountability. You must be a fairly decent person if another individual allows you to care for their child.
• Have you ever cared for an animal while their owner was away? See above. This also demonstrates that the pet owner can trust you with their fur-baby.
• Have you ever house-sat? Someone who gives you full access to their house definitely trusts you.
• Have you ever volunteered? Donating your time is HUGE. This will prove your selflessness, and ability to show compassion toward others.
• Have you ever tutored or mentored a child? See above.

Once you land your interview, dress to impress!

• Be sure to make frequent eye contact with the interviewer. Constantly looking away may signal dishonesty or nervousness. It’s like when you’re on a first date, you want to appear confident and appealing! Own your shit! You want that second date, don’t you? (AKA the job!)
• Keep your hands in your lap, or relaxed on the table. Don’t sit there and twiddle your thumbs or play with your hair.
• A no-brainer- DON’T CHEW GUM! You look like a cow chomping on grass, and nobody likes to hear chewing as they are attempting to interview you. Take care of your oral fixations PRIOR to the interview.
• Sit still, and focus on the questions. Carefully navigate tricky questions by turning positives into negatives.
• As you finish your interview, be polite, and say something along the lines of “Thank you for taking a moment to interview me.” Followed by a polite smile.

Certainly, not everyone will land their dream job the first time around. It takes time and perseverance on your part. Do some research on the organization you are applying to. If possible, make some internal contacts to get a feel for what type of work is done there.